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ajoke

*hagsrus By *hagsrus  (M)(F  over a year ago

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a farmer as 3 bulls a big bull a medium bull and a little bull big bull hears the farmer say hes getting a bigger bull. the big bull on the farm say well his not haveing all my bloody cow. and the medium ball say yeah his not having my bloody cows to and the little says hes not haveing my cows to.any way a couple day go by this cattel truck turn up on really hot day and this bigbig bull been in the truck for about 8 hours and hes got the raving hump. when the farmer lets him out,the big bull on the farm looks at the bigbig bull and say fuck it he can have all my cows and the medium ball says yeah he can all mind to. and theres your little bull snorting away and scraping his feet on the ground with his head down and big bull and medium bull say wot the fuck are you doing?litte bull says just letting that big fucker no that im not a cow

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

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A rabbit walks into a pub and asks the barperson !" what kind of food do you sell?" .. we only do sarnies etc....

erm ... "ok" said the rabbit, "I`l have a cheese and ham toasted sandwich"... the rabbit got his food, ate it and left the pub.

Next day, the rabbit once enters the same pub...

" I enjoyed yesterdays lunch so much i`l have another toasted sandwich... erm... Chicken this time please"... Once more the rabbit ate his food and left....

Next day... Once more the rabbit entered the pub, " barman you serve great toasted sandwiches, i`m hooked! today i`l have a bacon and tomato toasted sandwich"... once again the rabbit ate his food and left...

A week went by and another customer in the pub asked the barman.. " i haven`t seen that rabbit in the pub lately"...

The barman replied you not likey too either.. unfortunatley he passed away!!

the customer shocked!.. said the rabbits dead???

"Yup" said the barman".....

He died of mixamatoasties !

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

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A bloke sees an advert in local paper "singing dancing talking dog for sale, £100"

Bloke notes down address and drives straight round and knocks at door. Dog answers, "hello" says man.

"hi" says dog, "come about the ad?" then starts singing and dancing, bloke is amazed. Then dog proceeds to tell bloke he has appeared in musicals, films and had a hit single. Dogs owner appears, bloke says " I am amazed you are selling him, why?"

Owner says " because he is a lying bastard"!!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

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Man phones up work "won't be in today boss, I'm sick"

boss says "how sick are you?"

man says "well I am in bed with my sister"

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

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paddy and murphy are walking down the street. Paddy sees a mirror someoen has dropped, picks it up and looks in it. He turns to Murphy and says "the guy in this looks familiar" Murphy asks for a look, takes a glance turns to Paddy and says "Paddy you idiot, it's me."

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By *lutandhubby  (M)(F  over a year ago

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man takes a cocksucking frog home for his wife, his wife says what am i supposed to do with this? man replys learn it to cook and FUCK OFF !!!!.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

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A dumb blonde goes to see a ventriloquist act, after the umpteenth gag about dumb blondes she jumps to her feet and starts to complain she is sick of being typecast as a dumb blonde. The ventriloquist offers his apologies and tries to placate her by saying it is just an act.

She replies " I'm not talking to you, I'm talking to that ugly little bastard sitting on your arm"!

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By *ivility   profile verified by photo (M)(F  over a year ago

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One for this site,

Do you know what an Australian kiss is,,, ??

Bit like a French kiss,,,,, but down under

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